Monday, February 01, 2010

Bow wow wow

Bend it like Barack.

No, no, Barack! This is an American you're bowing to! Maybe her name, Pam Iorio, confused you into thinking she was a foreign potentate. You really must get a grip on this protocol thing, man.

Repeat after me: Saudi prince = 120 degrees head-down attitude. Kenyan king = 90 degrees. Iranian president = 75 degrees. Khalid Sheikh Mohammed = go easy with this one; you know the kind of thing people will say.

But never, ever bow to an American. You are their Great Leader, Martin Luther King and that old white prez, Jim Washington or whatever, rolled into one. The world is your bag, not those fractious Yanks who don't grasp the wisdom of your plans for them.

So remember, if you find yourself starting to come on humble to a domestic bod, even if it's not one of those hicks clinging to their guns and religion, stop! Assume the appropriate stance: chin up, Mussolini style, eyes looking down on the person with distaste, like a cordon bleu chef spotting an overcooked leg of lamb.

Don't thank me, you're quite welcome. Who do I see about becoming your Toll Collection Czar?



MnMark said...

Obama is quite a piece of work. Truly the most alien person ever to be President. I have to confess I find it delightful when he does this kind of stupid stuff that confirms my impression of him and adds a little more to the growing impression among the public that the guy isn't quite what his supporters promised.

Anonymous said...

The more I view Obama, the more I feel that he is not American - not by cultural trait anyway.

Anonymous said...

The more I see of Obama the more I know the "United States" is doomed since it is populated by more than enough idiots to "make" this alien president.

God help us all.