Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Bridge out

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Mr. and Mrs. Hassan,
overcoming Muslim stereotypes

It is most unfortunate that Mr. Muzzammil Hassan finds himself in a spot of bother. It was his privilege to have "founded Bridges TV in November 2004 to counter anti-Islam stereotypes."
Hassan touted the network as the "first-ever full-time home for American Muslims," according to a press release.

"Every day on television we are barraged by stories of a 'Muslim extremist, militant, terrorist, or insurgent,'" Hassan said in the 2004 release. "But the stories that are missing are the countless stories of Muslim tolerance, progress, diversity, service and excellence that Bridges TV hopes to tell."

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Moderate Muslim

The message of the Religion of Peace was going full blast — er, rather, was making great gains — until just the other day. It seems that Mrs. Hassan was doing the unthinkable amid the tolerance, progress, diversity, etc. by starting divorce proceedings. One morning recently she woke up and could not locate her head. The police have charged Mr. Hassan with relieving her of it.

Mr. Hassan's present inconvenience would no doubt have been a trifling matter in Saudi, where he raised the lolly to put his network on the air. "Sorry, Sheik, but can you believe she wanted a divorce? It was a matter of honor." "Of course, of course, Muzzi. I'll put in a word with my uncle and my cousin will deal with the press. Take a vacation, why not. You need to recover from the great injury you have suffered."

It was also Mr. Hassan's malfortune that sharia law is still on the back burner in New York, while President for Life Obama has a few economic issues to sort before he can turn to the more important changes. Our entrepreneur might also have been luckier had he started his TV network in the U.K., where the Archloon of Canterbury recently said the country was coming around to his view that sharia law should be included in the country's legal system.

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Extremist Muslim

Had he only been a scrap more patient, he might have operated — uh, wrong word again — made his feelings known to his wife under sharia law in the United States. Just ask CAIR: they'll tell you it's coming. Mr. Hassan could have saved himself his current troubles, and simply reported his wife as a capital loss on Schedule D.

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7 comments:

Terry Morris said...

If Muslim women in America are going to lose their heads at the hands of their husbands, fathers, brothers and other male Muslim friends and acquaintences, then they can lose them in the lands from whence they came. What good is it doing them to be here?

Terry Morris said...

Mr. Hassan - Good Muslim.

Terry Morris said...

By the way, Rick, the story I read said that Mr. Hassan is once divorced. I wonder whether his first wife still has her head attached to her body?

Nutjobs!

Lorna said...

That about says it, I just have one more small thought I'd like to share

WHY ARE WE LETTING THESE FUCKING PREHISTORIC FUCKBAGS COLONIZE THE USA? WHY DONT WE ROUND UP ALL MUSLIMS, PUT THEM IN A CAGE WEARING PIG COSTUMES, GIVE THEM EACH A SWORD AND WHISPER IN THEIR EARS "HEY NUMBNUTS YOU'LL BE LANDING IN PARADISE SHORTLY?"

Rick Darby said...

Lorna,

Take it easy. The meds will kick in soon, and then I'll loosen your straps, I promise.

Voodoo child said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Rick Darby said...

Okay, enough. Muslim immigration should be stopped and the West should separate itself from Islam until Islam learns to behave. That's as far as it goes on this blog. There will be no more comments like the one I just deleted advocating violence against Muslims or anyone else. I should have deleted Lorna's comment too but since it's been up for a while I guess there's no point turfing it out now.